Skip to main content

The Selective Memory of Men: The Truth About Polygamy in Islam

 


It's almost comical how some men conveniently cherry-pick religious texts to justify their desires. The claim that Islam "allows" men to marry four wives is a classic example of selective reading. The reality? The Qur'an sets conditions-strict conditions-that most men today wouldn't even come close to fulfilling.

Polygamy Was Never About Men's Desires

When people (by people I mean men) bring up Qur'an an-Nisa 4:3, they conveniently ignore the context. This verse was revealed at a time when war had left many women widowed, and polygamy was meant to protect them, not cater to men's fantasies. Yet, somehow, modern interpretations have twisted this into:

"It's in a man's nature to desire multiple women"

Really? Since when did religion exist to indulge human nature instead of controlling it? Almost every major faith teaches discipline over desire--whether it's fasting, prayer, modesty, or even simple self-restraint. But suddenly, when it comes to polygamy, some men act like the Qur'an was written to validate their urges.

Fairness: A Condition They Pretend to Ignore

The second condition? Absolute fairness. The Qur'an says if a man fears he cannot be just, he should marry only one. But here's where it get's interesting:
You will never be able to be fair and just between women, even if it is your ardent desire. Qur'an an-Nisa 4:129

God Himself says men cannot be fair. Yet, some still claim they can. The audacity!!

So, if justice is impossible, why do so many men still insist they can pull it off? Simple: they ignore the definite and focus on the ambiguous.

The Heart's Sickness: Twisting Scripture For Personal Gain

The Qur'an itself warns about people who deliberately focus on the unspecific verses while ignoring the definitive ones. Instead of following the core message, they dig around for loopholes--ways to make the Qur'an fit their desires instead of shaping their desire around the Qur'an.

This is not about faith. It's about self-interest disguised as religious obedience.

May God forgive us for our shortcomings. Because if we are being honest, the real issue here isn't polygamy-it's the intellectual dishonesty of those who manipulate religion to suit their personal wants.

If we truly followed the Qur'an in spirit and not just in selective wording, many so-called "religious" arguments would collapse. But hey, as they say, ignorance is bliss.

Or in this case--convenient.

Comments

  1. It's own personal decision . Actually we all have knowledge , understanding and wisdom given to us freely. Its not in any particular religion that this happens, people have a tendency of interpreting the books to fit our selfish lifestyle . Ours is to always source for the truth and it will always set us free.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Exactly, we cannot blindly make terrible decisions backed with flimsy excuses. These intentional errors do have grave consequences.
      Source for the truth and it will set you free.
      Well put Maggie

      Delete
  2. This has illuminated light on this particular topic.

    The important question is this: is it justified to then marry a window/s ?

    Thanks for writing on this topic ✍️

    ReplyDelete
  3. As long as you do not oppress them, and you will be fair.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

From Teenage Pregnancy to Recovery: My Journey of Struggle, Support, and Empowerment

 I never thought I would become a mother at such a young age. When I found out I was pregnant, my world changed instantly. The father of my child wasn’t there in those early years, and while that was difficult, I was blessed to have my family by my side. Their unwavering support kept me going, even when the road felt uncertain. Years later, the father of my child and his family—his mother, brother, and sister—began to step in and help. Their support, though delayed, made a difference, reminding me that people can change and that help sometimes comes when you least expect it. My journey through young motherhood inspired me to do more for girls and young mothers facing similar struggles. This is why I became heavily involved with Protect a Girl’s Image Organization —to ensure no young mother feels alone and that every child gets the chance to grow up in a supportive environment. The Reality of Teenage Motherhood Being a teenage mother is a challenge, even with family support. Society...

The Illusion of Intelligence: Why Professionals Focus On Looking Smart Instead of Being Smart

The Corporate Façade Walk into any corporate office, and you'll notice a pattern - sharp suits, confident posture, carefully crafted PowerPoint presentations, and a whole lot of corporate jargon. Professionals in many companies are obsessed with looking intelligent, but when it comes to real decision-making, problem-solving, and innovation, many fall flat. This obsession with performing intelligence rather than applying intelligence is slowing down progress. Instead of hiring and promoting those with real knowledge and critical thinking skills, organizations often reward those who can simply sell the illusion of competence. To some degree it starts to complicate things, in that there are various factors at play and many of the actors in the system believe in a beautiful vision instead of value in outcome. So why is this happening, and how can businesses shift towards prioritizing actual intelligence over corporate theatrics? The Performance Over Competence Trap Keyword Focus: Corpo...

PRINCESS TREATMENT: THE DIVIDE AMONG WOMEN AND HOW MEN PLAY A ROLE

There's this thing about our female gender that doesn't sit well with me and I quite honestly don't understand. Why is it that whenever a woman is achieving a lot you find a cluster that feels she doesn't deserve it. Instead of being happy for her they start tearing her down as if it's an injustice done to them. It starts in their mind, which is usually visible especially with the condescending looks and sneers and when a fellow hater sees it, they somehow link up and then become friends. So uncanny I must say! Maybe it's the common interest; you know the how misery just loves company vibe. Anyway, most times especially in work places, you'll find a certain group of humans including men (shocker!!) discussing a babe and popular statements will be: Who does she think she is? Si urembo ni make-up. Hiyo pesa ni ya wazazi/ chali yake e.t.c Plus if you have ever been a victim of such unnecessary criticism, you'll always notice them looking at you with Hyena ...